7 Secrets to Navigating the Path to Your Heart

Lao Tzu said that the first step on the path to wisdom is the ability to say, “I don’t know.”

Come with me, take my hand and let me guide you on an adventure of a lifetime leading you to an internal transformation in ways you’ve never experienced. Bridging the heart and mind has its ups and downs, but since when is being on a roller coaster not exciting?

When I began to live mindfully, I had no idea where it would take me and what I would experience. It is sort of like you’re walking in a very dark cave never sure of what is in front of you, searching for a ray of light.  Navigating this path is about being comfortable with not knowing what is coming and recognizing those rays of light and seeing life in a whole new way.

Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: “I’m with you kid. Let’s go.” ~ Maya Angelou

Secret 1 – Be Prepared and Eager: Be ready for lots of change. This way of life will help you develop your instincts, observation skills and a deeper wisdom that your life is faceted and ever-changing for a reason. When obstacles arise you’ll understand that they have a purpose to help you experience the highest, best life possible.

The journey between what you once were and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place.  Barbara Deangelis

In 2009 when I woke up to what life is all about, I decided to take a leap of faith and begin to live an intentional life of consciousness. It was the scariest, best, most exciting jump toward a life of love, higher self-confidence, and authenticity that I’ve ever taken.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”― Lao Tzu

Secret 2 –  Mindfully choose – The connection between the heart and mind is about a life of continual self-improvement and seeing everything differently. Once you step into this way of life, you’ll never want to go back.

Secret 3 –  Appreciate your uniqueness – and let it shine. There is no one else like you in the world, you are very special, it is important to radiate that to the world. This way of life is about learning to love and accept who you are and bestow compassion, kindness to yourself that you would give everyone in your life.

Living from the heart is living authentically, whether that means having pink hair or lots of crazy colored clothes, being happy reading books instead of going out, living a bohemian life, whatever makes you the glorious and distinctive individual that you are. Laura

Secret 4 – You are your own best teacher – Get out and try whatever spiritual or self-improvement practices that interest you. Read books, take classes, there are a myriad of beliefs out there so it is important to see what they’re about. Then mix and match whatever you’ve connected with and make the journey your own because at the end of the day only you know what works best for you.

Secret 5 – Choose your tribe wisely and intentionally –  Remember that just because people label themselves as spiritual and it seems as though they’ve got it together, remember they’re only human. You will know in your heart who is and isn’t right for you, this is when you can use your intentional listening and observation skills.

Secret 6 –  Discover Your Gift –  Have you ever wondered what your purpose in life is?  One way to open the door to discovery is think about what you would happily do for free. Your purposes will be many stemming from your gift whatever that is, being on journey of discovery is what a life lived bridging the heart and mind is all about.

Secret 7 –  Connecting with Your Inner Guru –  Your wise and ever-present inner guru will be your life pilot. When your conscious mind is connected with your heart-wisdom, you’ll develop a knowing and feel shifts of energy that will be the signs that change is occurring. Then with the guidance of your inner wisdom, you’ll find the solutions that will move you forward.

Thank you for stopping by.

Authentic Living Helps you Comfortably Connect with Others

How Being Authentic Feels

How authentic have you allowed yourself to be?  Are you comfortable being exactly who you are? Being authentic is the only way that we can experience the best of ourselves. It is about being present, accepting, approachable and above all transparent. From my experience with authenticity, it is not only easier for me, it effects the way I interact and how people feel when I am in their presence. It isn’t anything specific that I do, it is just how I show up.

When you’re authentic, you will feel much more comfortable in your own skin. You’re naturally aligned with your own truth and easily able to discern those who are genuine and those who are not. To observe authenticity, go out into nature and observe wildlife. Animals and birds have no ego or agenda, they just are. Can you imagine living that way all of the time?  You can finally stop being a people pleaser and trying to live up to the expectations of others.

What I’ve Observed in Myself and Others

I am the first to say I led a dual life for many years. I was one way at home and another way at work. I believed that if I was completely myself, I wouldn’t be accepted. Toward the end of my business career I was so burnt out that being myself was the only way I could be, it was then that it was clear I wasn’t a fit with the corporate world.

I used to be so frustrated with people who were two-faced, I could not imagine how someone could appear to be friendly or honest, then be so insensitive or untrustworthy, it didn’t make sense. Over time, being awake to life has helped me to better understand that people can only be what they know. I don’t condone hypocrisy, but to those who are, I am aware, you are forgiven.

I’ve known many people throughout my life that have been disingenuous.  I’ve been betrayed, lied to and emotionally hurt because I took their inability to be real personally. One thing I’ve discovered is that how someone else acts is not directed just at you, they arc that way toward others and themselves. Like you, people are always doing the best they can, no matter how they appear. Until a person’s life is affected in a way that causes them to see who they really are, they won’t change.

Becoming Authentic is Like a Job

True authenticity is about going inward and looking at the patterns in your life, going into your past, why you choose what you do, how you feel about yourself and if you feel you are honest and can be trusted.

It is natural to feel discomfort with the thought of being authentic because of those parts of us that we keep hidden from everyone. That is okay, I dealt with some of my darkness on my own and I sought help with the deeper issues. You can peel through the layers of your dark side that you’ve stuffed down and heal without telling everyone. Authenticity is vital to a healthier life, you’ll feel lighter and more in tune with yourself.

Simple ways of authenticity that I’ve picked up:

1. Always be ethical
2. Modified Honesty (I am careful by always starting a conversation with, “If I may offer a suggestion or this is only my perception” with the thought in mind that my honesty is not to hurt or sway someone’s choices based on my opinions and beliefs).
3. Love your body just as it is
4. Accept what you look like and learn to see your unique beauty
5. There is no one like you, so choose to love yourself
6. Be comfortable with your own unique style
7. Stop caring about what others think
8. People pleasing becomes a thing of the past
9. No longer looking for approval and expecting everyone to agree
10. Seek help or guidance from someone you trust

Choose wisely, choose intentionally, thank you for reading this post, Namaste

Thoughtful, Engaged Communication Changes Everything

Part of what I love about living in awareness is learning to speak from my soul and being engaged when I listen. Engaged speaking and listening for me are about being attentive, putting myself in another person’s shoes, observing their body language, listening to the tone of voice and being aware of their feelings.

I’ve learned engaged communication and listening by experience and the hard way. I used to react, speaking and offering my opinion defensively and too quickly. Everyone suffered and tensions were always high. I was unhappy with myself, so I made a concerted effort to pay attention to the others in the conversation instead of being so self-absorbed. I’ve learned to really listen, think, then respond with a peaceful, loving presence, no matter who I am talking with. Responding takes more effort than reacting, but it is worth it when the conversation ends and no one is angry, tense or upset.

Talking without thinking, half-listening while we wait for a pause so we can talk causes disconnection, misunderstandings and suffering for everyone involved.  We have been conditioned to believe that it’s okay to talk whenever we want, cut someone off without any thought about the other person. What we’ve learned can be unlearned when we make the effort and we care enough to consider others involved in the conversation, no matter who they are or how they are in our lives.

The Method 

The method I use works whether on the phone or speaking person to person. When someone else speaks, just listen, think and then speak. I am not referring just to those you know and love, I am also talking about everyone that is in your life for whatever reason.  Have you ever heard the quote,  “you can catch more flies with honey than vinegar”, it is helpful, no matter who you’re speaking with to apply that theory to all communication so it will be productive and conclude peacefully.

Since I’ve applied this method, even the toughest people who I’ve come across are more at peace and relaxed when we speak, even when the conversation is two opposing opinions or the other person is tense. I hold a space of calm and understanding no matter how the other person is behaving, it isn’t easy, but it is the way I choose to be, you can too, it is definitely worth a try.

Here is a video that I found helpful. This psychotherapist offers more ways to learn how to communicate thoughtfully.

Thank you for stopping by, namaste

Integrity is Everything

I once heard someone say, that hell or heaven isn’t a place, it is how you’re remembered. It isn’t always the first or easiest thing to do in today’s world, but at the end of the day, integrity defines us, it is less about what we say and more about what we do, every second, every minute, every hour of every day.

Words can be an illusion for the truth, it is behavior that depicts who we are. I’ve learned over the years not to take anyone’s words as truth unless they act as a person of integrity by way of conduct.

Is it really worth it when a person chooses to commit any act of dishonesty telling themselves they have a perfectly valid reason why the end result justifies cheating themselves or someone else? Integrity isn’t just about how someone else is affected by what you do or say, it is how you feel about yourself and the choices you make.

Having power, success and things is temporary, anyone who trusts you as a person of integrity is forever, it is the most valuable part of who we are. Building an authentic life is a continuous process that includes integrity, resilience, astuteness, honesty, creativity, and more. Integrity is following the wisdom of your own heart and leaving a lasting memory of someone who knows that doing the right thing, no matter what, is all that matters.

Thank you for taking time to stop by.